Anna's Exit

Hello Good Souls,

As all of you now know, Anna has passed on--rather untimely--and is now in the arms of god. Yesterday, stood as the day which Western civilization changed forever--at least in the eyes of the media and E! Television fans.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_nicole_smith

These developments will lead to a post-mordum renewal of her show, likely hosted by the crypt keeper, and it will probably consist of only her prozac-loving dog with a camera mounted around its neck.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Nicole_Smith_Show

Her death is being treated and covered, by the media and her hurt and upset fans, in a manner similar to the way that Jesus. Additionally, her passing will be yet another indicator that the end of the world was close at hand, or that our new savior is a baby living in the Bahamas.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/End_times

Folks, always remember the following:

1. Being a billionaire, geriatric, and getting married without a prenup is a bad idea--especially if you marry a blond.
2. Fake tits are great.
3. There are other news stories out there.
4. Anna is with Jesus now; she is not coming back unless you believe in reincarnation.
5. Doctors sometimes prescribe too many meds.
6. Diet pills aren't all that great for some people.
7. Acknowledge the father of your billionaire heirs before dying
8. Paris Hilton + 20 years is what we lost
9. She is our generations Marilyn Monroe
10. Visit Florida and the Bahamas regularly, their state/national tourist councils will love you.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Florida

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bahamas

http://www.bahamasvacationguide.com/

http://www.bahamas.com/

Thus, as we go forth with our lives and on to a new day, the new reports about circumstances relating to her exact causes of her death will be debated consistently like a man masturbating.

Cheers & lots of beer, drugs, and titties,

Father T.